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Clink. Clatter. Ping!
Stir twice counterclockwise.
COUNTER CLOCKWISE!!!
Slop.
Add in a pinch of salt...
NOT A CUP!!!
Oh dear...
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Run here...no, there! Grab the peppers for me! Don't touch the knife! GAH! The garlic, not the onion! The garlic, girl! For god's sake, the thing that looks like a SHRIMP DUMPLING?!?
This is what is going on in the kitchens of LO right now. Unfortunately.
Originally, we were making tomato soup. And not just any. It had onions, garlic, cilantro, hints of basil, salt, chunks of dinner sausage...and, of course, tomato.
But now, it's got chives, onion, apple, and a floating chicken. o.o
Why must we cook? DDDx Don't you just wish we could live off air? Like...balloons? And then, we could float and fly and pass gas all the time. C:
But now, we are reduced to watching this thick, acrid mess bubble and froth.
"Those lumps are what again?" ^^;
"Tomatoes?" o.o
"We never put in potatoes, silly." <.<
"No, TOMATOES." x.x
"Nah. They kinda look like...smilie faces. That'd be a nice ingredient." C:
"Smells like fart, doesn't it?" =S
"Eww...But you know, now that you mention it, it kinda does." =o
"Well, at least it's not rubber this time." @.<
"Of course. Blood is just sooo much better." -_-;;
"Duh. What planet are you from?" Dx
"A different one than you, obviously." xD
"Well, here, we don't use chopsticks to try and shovel soup onto paper napkins." .-.
"Pft. Soup? This is...is...glue. Paint." x_o
"Hmm. Think we could decorate the walls with this? It'd be a nice shade." :S
"Well, it looks pretty enough in the bowls." =D
"Ah CRAP! I just spilled it on the table." D:
"Don't lick it!" Dx
"Wipe it!!!" 0.0
Finally, we have all settled down at the table with our various piles of gloop. I eat out of a collander in a glass mixing bowl with some dough still in it, Fae eats out of what looks like a hamster water bottle. Sar is eating out of a styrofoam bowl with a circle cut out of it so that the table serves as the bottom, and adri eats out of a watermelon rind. Yunsi is eating out of a gigantic oyster shell. Nerfe is prodding at a etched pot. And Destiny gets to shovel out of the burnt, oily cooking pot with a chopstick.
Why can't we afford proper silverware? >.<
I stare at the globs of soup, moodily. Slowly, I tip over the bowl so that it slops on the floor. It'll end up there anyway.
With Rampage dancing it in.
...
"Squeak squwak!"
See? o.0
"Where's the lemonade?"
"I thought we were going to use the acid to clean the floor."
Really. You see the puddles? They look like...
"BLOOD!!!"
Splitter. Splatter. Drip. Drop.
"Where's the mop?"
"Here, you can use my wig."
"Mm. Okay."
Swish. Swipe. Drip. Drop.
"And mine."
"And mine."
"Mine too, I guess."
"Take mine."
"Mine too."
o.o
We're all bald.
"You don't have hair?" >.>
"You don't?"
"YOU don't?"
Dx
What have we done?
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Author's Notes:
Hopefully, someone will recognize the allusion to the garlic and the shrimp dumpling. NOT an onion! >.<
Ah, did I forget someone in the silverware, or lack of, description? Hope not. :C
Time to go. See ya.
((Oh, and YYugi, since you said you're kinda out of the lawn ninja phase, what do you want to do, then?))
SnowPheonix · Tue Sep 19, 2006 @ 04:20am · 12 Comments
