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it's amazing how such few words can bring so much pain, i hate you or it's over, such emotions...such hurtfullness....we comand each others hearts with such ruthfullness, we break we heal we bleed, we all are human but some are not, some live and learn and walk amoung us, they know who they are and in what direction they should walk, even if they walk around in circles briefly,

i look at the love i have and the people i know, i look at my twin brother, everytime i think of him a smile comes to my face, i think of the past, and i think of the future, i think of all the time in the world, then i think of only this second, i think of how blessed i am to have found ones which mean so much to me, and of how close we are even tho i am half way around the world from them, such beautiful people, i wounder how i fit into it all, i wounder what people like in me, what they see behind my mask, or if all they see is the masks i give them, protecting my scared face from the world, protecting my scared heart,

i think, well..i think i think to much whee , i just can't help the feeling...i dunno..the feeling...that if i stop breathing i will be missed....but all i will become to most is another name forever offline on their list of friends, maybe once in a while thinking..i wounder where that guy i use to see got to, or a wounder what happened to tai...whats happening in his life...i think for now i will go back to thinking about my brother, and laughing at the way he is and how much i love him because he is that way, i'll go back to thinking about seek, and her giggle, even tho she insists everyone has the same giggle where she comes from, i'll go back to thinking about who i am, and who i am gonna be, and who this random chick that game me her phone number is, weather to call her, well acctually she works at a club i go to behind the bar, and i braught her a drink the other day and we got to a talking and really hit it off as friends, she's nice and all that, and easy to talk to, but i dunno, if it's me or if it's just her job to be like that to everyone,...but then i think, well i wounder if she gives her cell phone number to everyone as well... xp whee ...


anywho...all this has been fun...i guess i just needed to write some stuff down, clean the closet a little, i'll write more later no doubt, but for now, i'll say this

i love u rik my brother,
and most of all i love seek, my guidence...amoung other things....

and i love the rest of yall, cause ur just u...yeah...something like that...

oh big ups to rayvn, cause she's the shizzle and writes in my journal, lol... heart wink