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Since I wrote in my journal here and confessed to anything or talked or ranted on my Life... I think I'm guna do it again tonight... Maybe I'll Keep it up.

Well I''l start of with today. It was sort of good. Me and Momma went to go see a movie at this new theater, we went to go see Precious at a crapy old run down $3 theater. This Place was just so ghetto! (I'm going be a racist in this part so if you don't like it... F!@k you) This theater was filled up with some ghetto a** black people! (I was just so close to calling them ignorant stereotypical niggers right there in the journal) but ya. Right as I sat down some black chick behind me started whispering loudly to her black friend " OMG, What is this dude doing sitting infront of me?!" I was so close to standing up and telling her "Listen Shanahnah I'm sitting down here so get over it, now shut it before I pull out that crappy weave! I'm not sorry that I'm to tall to sit in this ghetto theater and block your view" (I have no idea what she looked like I am just assumeng she had a crappy weave)

The Movie Itself was good, depressing and good. It sucked to have to see it in that ghetto as place! I think some of the ****** rubbed of on me! cause when I got home my dad asked me why am I talking so loudly?

Later me and momma got some panda express after that. We left we played Lady Gaga and talked about her music. (Yes, Lady Gaga, I love her she is awesome, again dont like it go F!@k yourself then, Brittany I mean this metaphorically not literally you pirv). But she is going on asking what she means by these songs I told her so I'm guna list the songs and say what I think of them and what I think they mean and rant on it and my life
1. Bad Romance- I think this song is going about how it doesn't matter what others think about their love it is their love, she knows you may be the worst person for her but she doesn't care she wants the love you may have bad history she wants it all just you not caring about the rest of the world. (this is also how I basically feel about this one guy, I just want to be with him, but he makes it so damn complicated so now I'm just letting him drag me along waiting for the never when he is going to be with me.

and that is the only song I'm guna go over cause now I'm getting emotional over Will again... Ugh god! Why is it so complicated between us! ( I already know why but just listen to my rant if you made it this far in my journal) OMG! Why must I be so obsessed over a guy that says he loves me but wont be with me cause he still want to be with someone else, another girl! A person with a v****a!!! Why after that do I not just drop him or even the idea of him! Goddess I am so stupid! I just cant let him go! Even while at school he just teases me kissing my neck and cuddling and stuff! He knows I want to be with him but he just lets me drag along on the thought of him I let myself drag along on him! Ugh I need to find someone better then this! We had already gone out for a week last year, but we didn't even do anything at all we just had the tittle of a couple for nothing, he just dropped it. Why I'm I not able to let this go why must I be obsessed with him?!?!

What ever... I'm listening to Madonna and she is making feel better. I like Madonna she makes me feel good inside and I just get lost in that music and rhythm. I dance with myself alone in my room. mouthing or singing to it. I get lost in this music and no one else can do that to me. The world disappears and it is just me dancing and singing forever it seems.

Well that is it for now...
~DL_S
Christian B.