- Today,
is the twentieth of November.
It only seemed like yesterday
that it was September,
nonetheless, the beginning
of the school years.
And here, I am, typing near
midnight . . . because I don`t
want to go to sleep.
And I think . . . of the years
we share together, Vartak.
It will be over . . . in less than
half a year. December, January,
February, March, April, and
May. That is six months . . .
excluding November, because
it is almost at it`s end.
We truly have six months to
make the best of it. Six.
All of us . . . we`re nearly
going to different schools.
We won`t be able to see
each other much, because
of the more excessive amount
of work to be done for the
school. So let me ask . . .
how do you think we will
be " friends forever ". Does
such term even exist within
the twenty - first century ?
I remember my first " best
friend " I have had. It was back
in elementary school, where we
were little kids and such.
I moved away when I was five.
We were best friends since first
grade. We promised to be best
friends still. But the last time
I spoke to her, was sixth grade,
when I met her for my birthday
party back in the city I use
to live in . . .
Do you think that can happen
to us ? Will we actually have
new sets of friends, where we . . .
can not recollect the time we
have shared together back in
sixth grade . . . up until now ?
Or will we remember ? Will we
stay connected through Gaia,
through Chatzy, through Myspace,
through Facebook, through Twitter,
or whatever`s everyone is connected
on these days . . . Will we ?
I`m not god. I can`t tell the future.
People can`t either. It`s rare
to see a vision of the future.
So, what is the future that lays
out in front of us now ?
Who would graduate first ?
Who would go to university or college ?
Who would become famous one day ?
Who would be married first ?
Who would have children first ?
Who would . . . forget VARTAK first . . . ?
Those are the questions I ponder
on when I am deep in thought.
Who would be the first . . . ?
I don`t know. You probably don`t
know either.
I see much daylight and loyalty
within VARTAK. Even Roxy, who
we don`t speak to a lot . . . or
Amaye now . . . they`re still loyal.
We should know that.
VARTAK doesn`t really speak much
to each other-- not like we use to.
Back in sixth grade . . . every hour
of the day, we were speaking to one
of the VARTAK members.
Now . . . it`s eleven twenty - six PM,
in the last three hours . . . I have
not spoken to a member and have
a response back. And in school . . .
all we-- I can do is shout a mere
" YO ! " over the roaring noise of the
other students. And you would reply
back with the same greeting.
We never get to talk and chat for
more than five minutes at school
anymore. We`re that busy in life . . .
But that is probably because I don`t
have any classes with VARTAK,
only band with Ryuki. But nonetheless,
I am sure Ryuki, Roxy, and Riku
speak to each other within the classes
they do have together.
But not as much as we did in sixth grade.
Our last meeting in which everyone
attended, was the one at the mall.
The last time we had a meeting was
Halloween. That was nearly a month
ago. We agreed to meet every two
months or so. And it really doesn`t
feel like a long time since we had a
meeting, but that`s probably because
time flies really fast for me.
I haven`t seen Amaye in what . . .
two months now ? I haven`t spoken
to her either. I wonder how she is
doing . . . what her new friends are
like . . . if she found another best
friend or another group of best friends.
It`s sometimes good to wonder on
the subject . . . but sometimes, it
just brings tearful memories.
When we write / type messages
in dedication to VARTAK on these
journals on Gaia, everyone literally
put their heart and soul into the
words typed . . . and to the eyes
of those in public / their friends list.
We`re not afraid to show our care
for each other . . . it`s normal for
us to say " I LOVE YOU ! " to
each other-- so normal that we
shout it back and return within a
hug. And matters less, the people
around us don`t even give us odd
looks. Because they know by now.
Our friendship is strong. It held
tightly together since sixth grade.
But now . . . does anyone else
think that it`s slowly, very, very
slowly . . . breaking apart ?
We`re not talking like we use to.
We`re not seeing each other much
like we use to.
We`re not laughing with each other
as we use to.
We don`t even call each other a
lot, like back in sixth grade.
We don`t have a cosplay skit
anymore . . . like we use to.
We really have grown over these
times of hard struggles and pain.
We, unlike in sixth grade, are all
teenagers now.
Teenagers . . . as I heard, are the
years in which everything
happens. And I think to myself . . .
this " everything " . . . how will
it affect me . . . us . . . ?
Drama.
That can be caused throughout
us or the school system.
What will we do if we were
caught among the mess ? The
majority of us would stay out of it,
but if we were forced into the
drama . . . rumors will irrupt.
One of us might tear down.
That will hurt us all.
Love.
Sometimes . . . we are so annul
with love and finding a mate . . . at
this age, that we might completely
forget about the group of friends
we are in. You might be thinking
" no, no way ", but it is possible.
And to think . . . what if one does
not approve of another`s mate ?
Tension will rise.
That will hurt us all.
Other Friends.
It`s not bad. You have to have other
friends sometimes, ya know ? I
mean, it`s not fun sitting alone at the
lunch table and watch others chatter
away, or that there is a group project
and you are left alone to choose a
group and there is no one you are
close to--
But if to think that if one of us leaves
VARTAK to join another group that
we have no clue about . . .
That will hurt us all.
VARTAK, it is now eleven forty PM.
I have been typing this since what,
eleven fifteen . . . ?
And I`ve been thinking . . . of our
future. In the future, when we are
in college / university, when we are
actually legals to drink and drive . . .
will we still contact each other
over Gaia, Myspace, etc. ?
You know things gets old, and you
quit. Neopets-- we all had one. Or
another kiddie site-- Marapets,
Poptropica . . . whatever it is.
We all don`t play those anymore.
Maybe once in a while for the fun,
but once we get back, we usually
leave the next day or so.
Why ? Because we got bored of it.
Now, think. If we all got bored of
Neopets . . . and I have been playing
on that site since the age of eight,
I quit at ten-- will we quit Gaia as well ?
I know I have quit Gaia for almost a
year-- but that was before I knew you
guys . . . as well as myspace.
At this point, I check myspace and
Gaia, as well as Chatzy, daily.
But when school gets harder . . .
and it`s nearing time for us to transition,
the days will be cut short . . .
I won`t be able to check things daily
anymore. The last time I checked
my mail before five hours ago was
ten days ago . . . and I had five unread
mails in there ; two from my friend
in Canada, one from ff, and another
two. The two from my friend in Canada
was nearly a month late.
Why didn`t I reply to her ?
I forgot that I didn`t reply to her,
because the mail was unbolded.
And I thought that until today,
when I finally checked out my
inbox again.
It`s `forty - six right now . . .
almost midnight . . .
Vartak . . . how are we in the future ?
Are we still friends ?
No, can we stay still friends
even through every dramatic event,
to every piece and hour we`re busy--
will we find a way to interact, even
if it`s just a simple email that is
replied to once every two months ?
When we finish high school . . .
will we even hear of each other voice`s
anymore ?
Because, when we leave for
different schools . . . gradually over
the years . . . the only recollection
we could have in mind is the appearance
of what we were when we left . . .
And the next time we see each other . . .
who knows ?
How different would we look ?
I have been mixed up with Amaye and
Ryuki many, many times--
Will we look like we are today ?
But maybe a bit older ?
Or what . . . ?
What do you think, VARTAK ?
How do you think our future is ?
Will we survive ?
I truly hope we do.
The time is eleven fifty . . .
Good night, VARTAK.
