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Love... Hate... Jelusey... Pride...
Lust........... What is to say but....
These..... with compasion, are what I
Go through everyday, and still at night
I am alone........... a hollow shell that
Was really never full or used for that matter
Only when someone I care for talks with me
Do I feel......... human,
All other times I'm nothing, just a machine
That no one would care to notice
So....... What am I really then?
Am I a puppet to where those above me
Use and discard me when I'm no longer useful?
Am i a thought that was given a body to destory?
The sad fact that I face in the end, after being
In the dark, after being alone for so long,
Is that I am nothing, a nonexisting life
Lease till my name is called and life
Is brought to this hust of flesh again,
And this hust untill recently was lifeless
Soulless and now, with the sudden explosion
Of life sent to this hust, the rush of these things is made
Oh so appearent when in the dark voids of my mind
And now in this recording of my thoughts
......I am still a hust and tho others
Will read this I will not be called, I will not be spoken to
I will only know that this was read and only a shread
Of life will be given to this soulless flesh.
My life will continue to be as this phisically and mentally alone
Yet spiritally I do have others yet in the dark void that
Is my mind I can only see a picture of them
Or hear a whistper of thier voice
My one and true fear is that
I... will never hear my name called for more
Than for me to help another with a problem or theirs
Never to be called for the comfort of a lasting love or
For someone else to know that I still am there for them
Even when all others have forsaken them.
This one the only thing that I believe makes me
Hold on to humanity, and for this fear to come true...
I would then no longer be able to call myself a
Living Soul........... I would not even be a machine.......
I would be nothing..................