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I have been pushed to my limits and I still am at ground zero. I thought I was trying so hard and living each moment until I was frighteningly exhausted, but when I look back on the week's goals I wanted to achieve and the things I wanted to get done, nothings seems accomplished. Am I really trying so hard?

My week seemed hectic:
Ex. 4:45AM- wake up and get to school to finish homework; 7:20-2:30: School; 2:45-4:30: Cross Country practice; 4:30-7 or 8: Newspaper layout; 8:00-9 or 10: karate

Despite all that, my homework is not completed or completed very sloppily; my PreCal grade is a failing 67; I positively suck at XC and I have pain with my legs constantly; the Newspaper pisses me off because it sucks so much a** and Tuan is jackass that causes too many problems; some days I can't even enjoy karate anymore. I really feel broken down and tired. I want to just fall into a sleep I'll never wake from. Even he cannot bring me much comfort or joy, and that just dampens and darkens my mood further. I don't get the same jolt when I see him or the same pick me up. And I want that feeling, so badly. Where have all my emotions gone to if I can't even feel moved by him? Life sometimes, like now, seems too unkind in teaching.