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I can only push away the people I love. I can only hurt the people I care about most. I get upset over nothing and ruin relationships. I wish I could mend them but I cant. I only make things worse. Im tearing up inside, and my heart hurts. I cant think straight, and I wish I wasnt the way I am. I wish I didnt do what I do, and hurt how I hurt. I wish I wasnt the way I am. I miss being carefree and happy, without thinking about the hard, sad truth of anything and everything. I miss talking to have fun, and I miss talking without getting into big rediculous arguments.