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Hello, wings. |
Sporadic ramblings. |
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Kuro-Hane
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Posted: Tue Jan 25, 2005 @ 04:04am
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Ha Ha.
Today, I woke to my grandmothers voice.
I never, ever want to do that again.
Ever.
Never.
I mean, I love her and what not, but...
...quite frankly, she sounds dead. Complete with one of those creepy hoarse voices.
Sorry Grandma, but... You do.
* * *
In other news, I took my 2 part English final today. The first part was easy, just grammar and prepositional phrases, but the second part...
How the hell am I supposed to know why the little girl shut up when the hunter asked about the white heron?
...I chose D--Silence shows deep thought.
...It makes sense, don't you think?
* * *
My friend is obsessed with Green Day. She dragged me across half the campus to show me this girl wearing this faded Green Day t-shirt with the letters all cracked.
And then, on the bus, she sang "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" all the way to her stop. Which is also mine.
Oh, and guess what's playing on my playlist right now?
Yesss, Green Day!
* * *
I need to start doing yoga. Clear up my mind.
.......
Gotta save for a pirate patch! And brown Musketeer pants!
........
Eh. I need to get off. I have a science final, an Algebra final, and a history debate that counts as a final... And I was sick the day we rehearsed and everything...
Damn cold.
.......
I am pathetic.
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Posted: Tue Dec 14, 2004 @ 04:42am
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...bleh.
I was looking over my other entries, and they're all messed up.
Why the hell would I like 'All the Small things'?
I hate that song.
But of course, in my next entry, I'll say all the songs I like now are ******** up. Or just stupid. Or maybe I'll have come up with a better insult by then.
I suppose I have to list my favorite songs to hate them later, right?
Here goes:
1. All the Things She Said [tATu]
2. Ya Soshla S Uma [tATu] (It's the same as above, but in another language)
3. I feel So [Box car racer] (Did I mention this in my previous entry? I can't seem to remember)
Neh, I have more, but I don't really care for this list.
--
I realized this last weekend when I was sick (damn cough--
I'll finish that thought later. Right know, I feel like writing about my mum.
Like about how she just came down here, yelled at me, grabbed my computer away, and dropped it on the floor. And about her bland insults. Honestly, mum, those insults stopped stinging when I was six.
Back to the previous topic.
As I was saying, last weekend (when I was sick), I happened to notice how big my ego was. I think it's pretty big. Sure, it has some dents from my mum and dad, but it's still big from people telling me how good I draw, how well I write, how ******** tall I am, and ranting about how I look good without makeup.
As if I can get any.
My God, no wonder so many people hate their parents.
Personally, I can't wait 'till I'm in college or anywhere away from everything.
--
I think my parents don't hate me. Otherwise they wouldn't pay for everything I have. I suppose they just don't love me. Y'know the whole ordeal. They just want me to be everything they're not, and be better than I can possibly be.
They want me to get straight A+'s in Honors Algebra and whatever, but I'm killing myself to scrape A-'s.
They were dissappointed when I was First Chair in Intermediate Orchestra, and not Advanced Orchestra.
But who cares? I'll go get shipped off to Stanford or Harvard and then Medical school, and make millions so I can make them happy in their retirement.
As if.
I hate having my life planned out in front of me. Sort of destroys the point of having a life in the first place.
Oh, but on the bright side, my cousin's coming over for Winter Break. He always know how to make everything feel happy and stupid. Gotta love him for it.
Yeah. I think I'll let other people read my journal. Not like anyone's actually gonna comment, but if they do, it'll make my ego swell up even more.
Yippee.
Fin.
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Kuro-Hane
Community Member
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Kuro-Hane
Community Member
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Posted: Thu Dec 02, 2004 @ 03:58am
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Beh.
Whoo, life's is ******** boring.
Sit, mope, stand, mope, etc.
I'd be yawning right know, but [*yawn*] looks so pathetic and uninteresting. Completely deprives myself from the acknowledgement that I am literate.
This weekend was fun. Can't remember why, and it seems so far away... Whatever.
Let's see... I've made my journal private, so only I can read it... Maybe one day I'll change it back...
Nah.
Since I may oneday look back at this and laugh so hard that I'll start snorting, I'll write everything here.
Starting with my favorite songs.
-Welcome to my Life by Simple Plan. It's so-so.
-Are you Happy now? By Michelle Branch. I like it.
-All the small things by Blink 182. You wouldn't expect me to, but I like it.
-One Step Closer by Linkin Park. Especially at derelicte.com whe the owner makes it into a music video using the Showdown of Fate material from Kh.
Damn, I love that game. I got Kingdom Hearts Final Mix, but I really have had no time for PS2 lately. I guess that's what winter break is for, right?
I wish things were easy in Gaia. But no, somehow make money and buy expensive clothes and immediately you're worshipped. Much fun.
I suppose I could be working harder to maake money and whatever.
I guess I'm just a cranky fool.
Right know, I love Sakende Yaruze.
Tomorrow I may not.
.
Maybe I'll put what I consider to be my accomplishments here.
I can draw things that resemble human life forms.
I can write things that people add to their favorites list and add long reviews.
I can make practically anyone laugh. Something about my sarcasm. ******** idiots.
I can spell a sentence with decent grammar. Not quite an accomplishment, but considering that this is Gaia, where literacy is unheard of...?
I can get away with A's on essay's where I can call major themes half-assed, use spatulas and eBay in similies and call certain people a**l about certain things. Lovely teachers I have.
I can procrastinate very effectively. Although I am not proud of the fact that I have to procrastinate... I don't feel like finishing this sentence.
I don't feel like finishing that list.
When I think in sentences, they ussually start with "I wish" or "I want".
I am so ********... Ugh.
On a side note, I like Full Metal Alcheimist. And Trigun. And Gundam Seed.
Athrun..?
Kira.....?
.
Don't force me to shut up. I am quite capable of doing so myself.
I think I must stop having '********' and what not appear in my writing.
It annoys me.
.
I write a whole lot for finding life '******** boring'.
.
How do people know when they're gay? Or lesbian to be grammatically correct.
I think I am bisexual.
Weeeird.
Maybe not.
Who cares?
.
.
.
Fin
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Posted: Tue Nov 09, 2004 @ 04:25am
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Lethe
To forget the pains and woes of life are but the greatest gift.
I'm really confused. Since fancy words never got me anywhere, I'll just skip to the important crap. Yes, it's important, but it's still crap.
There's this guy in three of my classes, someone I've never liked, but have tolerated. But then, ever since the beginning of this year, he stares at me. In Orchestra (though I don't know how that's possible when you're playing the violin) in Algebra (Honors, so I don't understand how he has the time to stare) and Science. Which is understandable, since I'm usually asleep in that class. I didn't notice at first, but my friends did, and they go and badger him. And annoy me.
So it seems he admitted to them that he thinks stuff about me that I would find embarrasing to type. I didn't hear much, because I was... catching up on homework. Bleh.
I don't want any of this in my life. If I did, I'd have signed up for Drama I.
And I've been tired for the past month or so. If you asked me how I felt any time during then, I'd say tired. My best friend has become my bed, but it's so hard being faithful to it.
Sigh. I need a tablet. Something nice like a Wacom Inutos3. I've got $90 dollars saved...
Sometimes... Sometime I wish I had wings. And I could just rise up and fly, fly away... from everything... go someplace nice and warm... and soft...
Or I could just walk upstairs and go to bed. Whatever. It's only 8.
I feel lost alot, and afraid over stupid things. Like this report, and wondering how to classify it.
But the truly hard things--the ones that everyone else worries over-- I can do those, no problem. It's the small things that worry me.
I don't think I have real friends. Aquaintences, people to call up when I've forgotten to write down the homework, people to sit next to on the bus, a person that I'd choose to do a report with, someone to hang out with at lunch. But no one to confide in.
Have you ever felt that you have no one to talk to? No one to tell your sob story to?
I sometimes feel like I can't talk to my parents either. Like my Mum's alway pissed off at something or the other and never really listens. Hears, but doesn't listen. My Dad's alway got work, commuting to wherever on weekdays and interior design on the weekdays. Well, he just plays with our house, building stuff, making me and my sister help.
I wish I could just have one day, one damn day just for me. Not worrying about getting straight A's so I won't dissapoint my parents, not caring that my room's a mess, never once thinking. Just relaxing. Sleeping, somewhere cold. Taking long showers without having to worry if I'm using all the warm water.
I could go on, but no one needs to listen to my sob story.
Thus concludes The woes of the Pathetic.
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Kuro-Hane
Community Member
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Kuro-Hane
Community Member
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Posted: Mon Nov 08, 2004 @ 01:14am
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Posted: Thu Oct 28, 2004 @ 02:04am
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'ello, World.
-sigh- I want to be hugged.
--
This week, I've been getting no sleep, and keep on falling asleep in school. I can't speak a sentence without yawning. I must look terrible, 'cause I notice a lot of people staring at me. Ah, well. Who cares? Only about 160 days of school left, 'till summer! Nyah. My school is loaded with homophobes. I was reading Gravi in Algebra (honors, mind you.) and a girl asked if she could see it. I wondered if she had any clue what it was, and apparently she didn't 'cause she started with a chorus of "eew" after reading a little. I thought it was funny. Her reaction, I mean.
I'm gonna get an OMG hat someday. Or maybe a AFK hat. Heh, dream on, right?
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Kuro-Hane
Community Member
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Kuro-Hane
Community Member
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 @ 01:54am
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