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randdom stuff i remember

	crushed by misery
	crushed by misery


.........Why does my heart seice to beat .. Just as soon as you walk in the room? Your prescence of personality alone.........makes me forget ...that anything was ever wrong, that anything ever mattered... I guess thats just your charm... the same charm that put me under this spell of everlasting thought....and confusion... My heart cherishes the memory of you...thats fading away.. Every time i see you...i just to fall into your arms And cry ..........never let go....... For the same gaurdian angel thats blessed me with your aquaintence Has been the haunting demon whos cursed me with the pain That lingers my soul The same pain Thats been etched into my soul With a rusted blade Its an set scar engraved in my heart It reads clear as crystal ... moni-chan16 · Tue Apr 10, 2007 @ 03:25am · 0 Comments

	time to give up?
	time to give up?


i've thrown the past away and started to give up then....i found you....you found me more like it.... and ever snce then.... the pain has been etched into my soul but along with that pain comes respect and loves...... I wish i could show you the real way i feel but everytime your around nothing really matters because without you... i don't know what i would do.... it's strange how you could feel so much depression and pain and in the midst of it all love life like you never have before so answer me this... what should i do? in times like this wen i'm swallowed up in thedepths of my mind i can't help but think what should i do what does he think everytime i har your voice or see your face i feel that depression thats so extreme that i'm happy most people would have given up by now.. but...to give up hope.... is to quit altogether what doesn't kill you will make you stronger... isn't that what they always say? i think at this point i've been dead for a long time but you can't help it and neither can i every time i'm about to win somethig happens and i'm back at square one so......what would you do? would you have given up? moni-chan16 · Tue Apr 03, 2007 @ 07:46am · 0 Comments

	look up at the clouds
	look up at the clouds


look up at the clouds can't you see all of the proud and flawless clumps of soft white cotton? In my spare time theres always once where i step out of my house in the middle of the afternoon and lay on the soft lush grass and stare up at the white clouds that are almost painted on the sky... moni-chan16 · Fri Mar 23, 2007 @ 10:44pm · 0 Comments

	.... a fresh new start...
	.... a fresh new start...


forget you..... i apologized i did everything.. hell i changed everything just to adapt! you didn't even turn our head or blink so screw this.. screw you.... it may not be easy to replace you nad your many issues but recently i found someone better who likes everything about me and whose perfect in every way... so go ahead continue to use us all like objects hell it's like you said "all girls do are piss me off, i'll do what i was sent here to do" "skateboard and DBZ" besides the way things are running you could get any girl you want get one with no problem see how long it lasts get some cash off a bet on her and replace her... so good bye at this point i don't even really want to look at your face not that you even really know me surprised at one point you actualy knew my name.... if you can even remember that blood stained slate? well guess what it's white again NO THANKS TO YOU! ....so hey thanks for all the help dammit..... ....i hope you have a good life, jerk..... ...with all the ****** money you make i'm sure you'll be fine... moni-chan16** · Wed Mar 21, 2007 @ 06:31am · 0 Comments

	i wish
	i wish


i wish you could see me see me for reall i feel what only i can feel but if that don't appeal let me know... i wish everyone could see... i'm nobody's fool but now i just wish you'd go away... which shouldn't be hard. considering if i walked up to you you probably wouldn't even recignize my face its amazing what even a year or two can change.. you don't answer to your name when i call all it takes is her faint whisper and your ready to kill for her... ......serve the world and heavens up on a platter you used to hug me and love me like a sister. to bad...you can't even look me in the eyes and see whats inside... but i'm nobodys fool.... i wish i was over this but i don't even want to see you face.. because its to late.... sure i'm still here.... so just forget it.....it'll be easier....dunno why i even talk its not like anyone hears they're to preocupied.... i wish i could believe you when we used to talk and you'd say it will all work out....... that glitter i used o have in my eyes whenever i saw you is gone and a little part of my sould has been torn like a cloth and each day it gets worse...... but aside from that and my heart.... thats been crushed, grinded....and sprinkled into the streets... i'm fine.....forget i said anything.... that is.....if you'll even talk to me...... moni-chan16 · Wed Mar 14, 2007 @ 07:50am · 0 Comments

	open your eyes 2
	open your eyes 2


....you don't give a st...... thats when i decided.... why shouoldi i care you weren't there when i was sad and now i'm in this thing alone am i just some chick you placed beside you to take someones place? when i turn around you probably don't even recignize my face you used to love me you used to hug me... but that wasn;t the case eeverything wasn't okay i was left to cry and thats when i decided why should i care you weren't there when i was afraid....... i'm starting to trip and loose my grip crying out loud in the dark.... so hy should i care about you? if you don't care then i don't care were not going anywhere moni-chan16** · Wed Mar 14, 2007 @ 07:39am · 0 Comments

	open your eyes
	open your eyes


open your eyes..... i wanna believe oyu when you tell me that it'll be okay.... and i try to believe you... but i don't it's the first time i've ever felt so lonely... ...i wish somebody would come.... and cure this pain... i try to believe you but not today ..it's funny when you think it's gonna work out... ....till i realize what a jerk you really were..... there all the same... with all the same made up story.... i don't know how i feel tommorow it seemed like every time i tried to make you smile.... ...you always feel sory for yourself..... i don't know what to say tommorow is another day ....every time i try to make you laugh..... ..you can't be to tough you think your loveless i'm gonna do what i have to do.... just give me a little time maybe its not to late.... is it to much to ask for from you? and i wanna believe you when you tell me that it'll be okay yah i try to believe you just not today tomorow it may change. but i guess.......i thought you'd come around.... so i thought you'd have the decency to emerge... ...i'm not about ready to look at your face... you were of what ou make me feel right now i feel invisible to you like i'm not reall ...you can't see the world through a mirror it won't be to late when the smoke clears.. ..cause i'll still be here.. but it doens't matter... moni-chan16 · Wed Mar 14, 2007 @ 07:37am · 0 Comments

	when i close my eyes.
	when i close my eyes.


when i close my eyes i think about love and how from love can only bring hurt....... .......i look to the depths of my soul and question..... ...is the hurt truly worth it? it seems like i try every night just to get your picture out of my head and away from my bleeding heart ...your soft subtle smile ....will never be gone........ affection lingers my longing heart.... my cheeks fluster as your deep warm eyes go through my mind everytime i lay on the grass and look up at the glimmering stars your kind words.....and soft personality ..........put the sparkle back into my eyes....... ....................as i lay looking a the night sky................ moni-chan16 · Thu Mar 08, 2007 @ 07:38am · 1 Comments

	a heart made of mirror
	a heart made of mirror


a broken heart's like a broken mirror what is it they say? seven years of bad luck when you break a mirror? ....i'd say it was bad luck that broke the mirror in the begining.. i don't know why i even try anymore it's useless theres no chance my heart will ever suceed my head is allways being logicall i guess i'm just stupid to keep up with this because half the time it leaves me in the dust..... someones ripped out my will to love and thrown it on the ground my now empty body left to bleed in the dirt.. the little part of my soul that used to love now has a gash across it....... i don't want to love anymore because where i should feel love it aches. ....its hurts to much ........and besides...............hard work is great but in love it means nothing. so thats it i give up no more of this i'm sitting in the dark in the world of forever. a place where i will never find love ...and a place where the pain of love will never find me... moni-chan16 · Fri Feb 23, 2007 @ 07:48am · 1 Comments


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