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The feeling of the tears,
warm for a second before it becomes cold with the air.
Harder to breath then it was a few minutes ago,
fighting to take a smooth breath.
Forcing myself to turn away,
hide my pain away from you and everyone else.
You enjoy playing these games,
don't you?
You find comfort in my pain,
pushing it all onto me.
You've known all along that I was afraid,
I was so scared to tell you I love you,
all for this reason.
You riped out my heart and let it fall to the floor.
You laughed at my pain, at my tears.
You used me for the little I was worth,
then you dropped me.
The times you held my hand,
the times we've kissed,
we embraced,
you told me you love me.
You told me I was your world.
I can't believe I took the bait,
I fallowed you head over heals,
I wanted you for myself,
I wanted you to be with me forever.
And now you spit at me like I'm trash,
I can't believe you easily you can just bounce away,
from me to someone else.
One of these days it'll be your down fall,
you'll ******** with someone you're not supposed to,
you'll try to do to them what you did to me.
I can see it now.
That person you're with now,
are they treating you the way I did?
When you're kissing them, do you think about all the times you told me you wouldn't leave me?
That we'll be together forever,
that I am your only love?
Are you still thinking about me,
the way I still think about you?
Do you still see me,
the way you've seen me before?
Do your lips itch when you're near me,
do they want to open and tell me you're sorry?
You can take my pain,
hold it to you,
make it becomes your source of happiness,
can't you?
 WoW Junkies FTW · Tue Jul 04, 2006 @ 03:39am · 0 Comments |
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Someone will always remind you of the ones you love. |
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For the first time
in quiet sometime,
I feel as though
I can be accepted among more then just my friends.
No tears involved here,
no pain.
I actually feel like I can be accepted by more then just a handful.
Though of course,
my friends will be the more important to me,
the most beloved.
I have still found that others see me too!
People I don't know,
willing to know me
meeting me just that day,
calling.
It makes me feel like I'm a bit more then just another face among the crowd.
Them calling me,
makes me feel that people think about me,
even when I'm not around them.
Phone calls,
hearing their voice,
though I know they are either down the street,
or hundreds of miles away,
it makes me feel better.
Today he called,
and he asked for me,
no 'wrong number' and
no 'forgetting'.
He called and laughed with me,
Soothing the pain I have gained for the past few days.
He knows what I am going though,
and he must have been able to read it on my face,
for I said nothing,
but he was able to talk with me about it.
After meeting this guy today,
I'd have to say,
he's become a friend.
He lives a few cities away,
a double digit worth of miles away,
but he was still able to make me laugh.
He talked to me about his life,
he talked to me about his friends,
his troubles,
he listened to me about my life,
he listened to me about my friends,
about my troubles.
But the on thing that I pulled from that hour long phone call,
was that people,
no matter where you are,
will always remind you of a person you love.
And he, just so happened, to remind me of a loved friend of mine,
that of which is having many problems herself,
having to fight her way though without me at the moment.
He reminded me of her so much,
that when I heard the beep though his phone,
after our good-byes,
I hung up,
and I cried.
I missed her now,
more then ever,
more then anyone would know.
I regret my choice of staying here now,
Just thought I'd put that in the open.
WoW Junkies FTW · Wed Jun 21, 2006 @ 11:19pm · 3 Comments |
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My last breath slowly slips my lips,
Pulling from me everything I once lived for.
My back may press the ground,
but I'm falling, I can feel it.
Your hand presses my arm,
and you're leaning over me,
saying my name over again.
But as this very last breath of mine slips from my body,
pulling my soul with it,
I know I'll be back.
All the names of everyone I've ever loved runs my mind,
as if that's all there is to think about.
It causes a tear to stream my face, tumble down my cheek.
It makes me sorry this had to happen,
Makes be sorry for doing this to them.
For doing this to you.
I'm passing on, and I know it will be the hardest on them.
See, the feeling of death washing over,
it's just so welcoming.
I don't want to fight it, I don't have enough energy.
My lips part and I whisper one last thing.
"Sorry"
That's all I manage, though my mind still says more.
If it was possible I could feel the words pouring through my lips and flowing over me.
But it's not.
All the things I wanted to say, are now unable to be spoken.
I can't tell you how much I love you,
how much I'll miss you,
I'm sorry for doing this to you,
I'm sorry for the times I've made you cry.
I can't tell you my secrets that burnt my mind and lips so many times before.
And I can't tell you that I'm sorry if I'm taking your heart with me,
And that I can't promise to give it back when we meet again.
They are here for my soul now,
and as I look at my lifeless body, being grasped by you as you sob in to my unmoving shoulder, I see now how valuable life truly is.
How much you really mean.
Keep in mind I love you.
Never forget me either.
You see, if you forget;
I'll never be able to give your heart back.
WoW Junkies FTW · Mon Jun 05, 2006 @ 08:11pm · 1 Comments |
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In the darkness of my thoughts,
the darkness of his mind,
I can actually picture the light she told me about.
The single green colored light that stands waiting for me.
Waiting for me to force my way to it,
force my way to you.
She told me of the smiles I would be able to show again,
and the tears I would be able to save.
The time I can save not crying over you.
The things I can do without you haunting my every thought
my every movement.
You can smile,
you won't cry.
You won't do the things I'll do for you.
But if you're able to keep this up,
maybe you found your light.
Now it's my turn to stand and take the time to walk to mine.
To swallow my fear of getting over you and to save myself.
I'll get over you,
sooner or later,
I'll get over you.
And you see, when those times come... I'll be with her, and I won't have to think about you any more. I won't have to put up with these breaking thoughts anymore.
I'm standing near my light now, I can already see the life that's waiting for me.
Good luck to you my friend.
WoW Junkies FTW · Mon Jun 05, 2006 @ 08:09pm · 0 Comments |
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In my dreams
you told me you loved me.
In my dreams,
you just stood and held me.
In my dreams,
you smiled and kissed me.
In my dreams,
you were mine again.
I wake only to find I live in the nightmares...
The darkened dream,
knowing the fact that I had you, but we fell apart.
It's been so long since we've spoken, so long since we've embraced.
In my dreams,
you wouldn't let me go.
In my dreams,
You told me I was the only one for you.
In my dreams,
You said I fit in your arms like the missing puzzle piece.
I wake only to find I live in the nightmares...
The darkened dream,
knowing the fact that I had you, but we fell apart.
I miss your kiss, I miss your voice, I miss your touch, and I.. I miss you.
In my dreams,
We sat and talked.
In my dreams,
You never left my side.
In my dreams,
you told me you missed me when we were apart.
I wake only to find I live in the nightmares...
The darkened dream,
knowing the fact that I had you, but we fell apart.
I know we won't be together again. I know that we are old news and you went for someone else...
but you see, I sleep every night, and who can control what you dream other then me?
WoW Junkies FTW · Mon Jun 05, 2006 @ 08:08pm · 0 Comments |
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The look in your eyes,
the feel of your lips.
The taste of your kisses,
and the feel of your fingertips.
So close,
and so warm.
The power of your words,
the look of your expressions.
The closeness that grew so quickly,
and the time you give to be with me.
So close,
and so warm.
The strength of the hugs you have given me,
the words spoken against my lips.
The refusal to let go of you,
and the thoughts that hold us together.
So close,
and so warm.
The balance we make together,
the single we can make.
The punches we threw at each other,
and the kisses to make up.
So close,
and so warm.
The ways you held on to me,
the ways I've held on to you.
The anger that suddenly sparked,
and the lust that suddenly grew.
So close,
and so warm.
I write this because I feel I can,
I write this because I know I can.
You can see me, you always have,
but the funny thing is:
Will you notice that I love you,
or will I have to say it before you do?
So close,
and so warm,
So please don't move,
I want to see those dreams again.
WoW Junkies FTW · Mon Jun 05, 2006 @ 08:07pm · 0 Comments |
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Question to a lost loved one |
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Sneaking up behind you and holding my arms loosly around you.
Our Last Kiss
Sitting so close to you listening to your voice as you continued talking to me for what seemed hours
Our Last Embrace
Ever so softly kissing your jaw as you lay so close you're almost under me, when were in your best friends bedroom
Our Last Touch
Coming over to watch a movie that neither of us paid much attention to, only leading to you walking me home later
Our Last Moments
Kissing and whispering, wanting nothing else more then to claim each other as our own, but ending it when I told you I wasn't ready yet
Our Last Words
But now that I look back at these memories, I think maybe you were right: I do deserve better
Your Last Excuse
Do you remember all those times I told you I loved you? Well, now I notice: I ment it everytime
My last Question.
Did you?
WoW Junkies FTW · Mon Jun 05, 2006 @ 08:06pm · 0 Comments |
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