*Sigh*
Sometimes I'm not sure where my own head is at in regards to my emotional security.
One moment I think "Well, I might be getting over this" or "I'm surely over that one person from a few months ago"
But then, something pops up and it just reminds me "She's no longer an option"
Today, I spoke with an old romantic interest of mine. She had moved in with her new boyfriend and it just pisses me off. (Yes I'm a lonely, jealous douchebag. Deal with it)
I'm not sure what sucks more. The fact that whenever I see someone who once had feelings for me, give those feelings to someone else, or the fact that I blew every chance I had back when I was her first choice.
I'm 22 years old now, kids.
Most of whomever reads this, may be under 20, or even 15 or less.
Take my advice here.. I wish I could take my own, but I can't anymore.
Whenever you know someone who feels strongly towards you, if they want you and if they're a great friend of yours.. Just think to yourself.. "In 3 or 4 years time.. Will I regret losing this person by saying No, now? Can I afford to lose her?"
I've asked myself that question before.. Each time, I said "No.. I don't want to lose her" But I did. In every one of those situations.
The cause of which are my own issues..
Issues I recently tried to overcome, but failed.
You don't want to get to my age, with anywhere near the amount of regret that I hold from the past 4-5 years.
I can better myself, grow, evolve and learn as much as I can. But that however, will not change the past. Everything I've already done, has effected my life, and the lives of those I care about immensely.
Can I say if it's for the better or not?
Well.. Maybe in some cases, it turned out for the better. But in others... Not so much.. Not at all.
That's my thought of the day.
I'm done here~
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