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"Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss
But I only sleaped with you, because I was pissed."

"I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I meet your brother."

"Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty, and so is your head."

"Of loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face."

"Kind, intelligent, loving, and hot
This describes everything you are not."

"I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don't take that paper bag off of your face."

"I love your smile, your face, and your eyes.
Dam, I'm good at telling lies."

"My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life."

"I see you face when I am dreaming.
That's why I always wake up screaming."

"My love, you take my breath away.
What have you steeped in to smell this way?"

"My feelings for you no words can tell
Except maybe "Go to hell"."

"What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime."