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i just jion gaia and so far this sh!t it off the hook
why, what is life what meaning is it?
i always ask myself why, what is life what meaning is it?, why would god save some one like me, i should be dead at less 5 times now!, what reason is there for one with no fair, or destiny. every time i put my hand of trust to some one it is shot down, in pain my soul crafs for the tough og another, it hide in the shadows afrad to again be hurt, ever if some one shows there truse it hides in fear of the cold knife of betrayal. people who see me think im showing my emosion with my face , but im not deep down is the sad and alone soul waiting for that one person, to save it from the dark and return it to the light. i bottle my emosion afeard to show them to a jugeing world and hold them back, leting the grow more into more pain and sorrow, years of doing this has had its effects on my mental heath, donig so i formed mutiple personalites, each show there emos the basic emotions of the human soul, sorrow, anger, love, and fear. love and fear are nomal for me and are how i walk around, sorrow is know as the outlaw, who is know write this from my very soul, anger.... i fear my anger. my life bad, many thing have angerd me to the point of mental brake down , yet i still bottle it up. my anger is a demon that tell me to kill, steal, destory. but this is all human nature to do what it takes to survive, but for it its not enough, it wants war blood shead, lifes ton apart, ulitamtely the end of the world.ever those who i call friends my anger wishes to kill, he would so love to kill ever one of them, one by one limb from limb, just to hear them scream. what does god want from me? why? is it to save others from my path to make shere that no ends up like me, loveless, alone, insane and fearful of the unknow?, why god?why?






User Comments: [11] [add]
Kore Andromeda
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commentCommented on: Thu Nov 30, 2006 @ 05:27am
We continue to live because our purpose has not yet been fulfilled. We all live for a reason. It is human nature to be angry, I'm so glad your anger does not get the better of you. (I kinda like living) And there are many who feel the way you do, alone and confused in this insane world we currently dwell in. I sometimes feel the same way.


commentCommented on: Thu Nov 30, 2006 @ 05:34am
well i was with u the whole way on the top part. i too live a lonly life that i wish not to live in. but at the bottom it scares me . will u hurt me cause i wouldn't like that at all. i'd tell u to let ur soul out but that might make things worse. maybe u should see things in a diffrent way confused confused



babystar2
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outlawgrave
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commentCommented on: Thu Nov 30, 2006 @ 05:40am
yes, but why, im differnt in way that the ppl you say are just like me dont ever ture me they hate my ever soul, and what porpose does one who death reject,have, alone confused are not thing that can be say about my true soul only, thing said to cover it, my soul feels as tho it need to hide, ever my face feels the same way, i hid it with masks so that no one can juge me.and i use mask to show emotion , for i cant. and anger will take the best out of any one, i almost kill 3 friends of my out of anger....ever my own dad in the same day in less then 1 hour. some thing i blame on events lke never haveing a birth day party, but mostly i blame my self

im i a tool for humans to use, why, why im here now and not wander around lost in would of the dead?


commentCommented on: Thu Nov 30, 2006 @ 05:45am
what way can i show my soul with out leting my anger out?
i dont want to hurt ppl any more. i just cant control my anger and lose my self what sheem to me peace and relex and the grateist estise that can enter the human form, but only a bloodly painful trip to distustion, makeing other hate and attack more. my soul is traped in this end less painful loop



outlawgrave
Community Member
princess _ayame
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Thu Nov 30, 2006 @ 05:53am
kool kool kool


commentCommented on: Thu Nov 30, 2006 @ 06:00am
we all live for one reason any way you look at it: if there where no people or living things the gods would start doing drugs and/or kill them selves.... i think sweatdrop



Blackjack O Hare
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outlawgrave
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Thu Nov 30, 2006 @ 06:01am
kool! this is my life wemon, not no kool, GOD damn it she never understands me
somr humans can fell for other, and reject them for not being them and have the same or close soul( 2 souls can ever be the same compltly)


commentCommented on: Thu Nov 30, 2006 @ 06:03am
andy.....wtf, god has better things to do then drugs that and there is always a living orinism in the univers



outlawgrave
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Zar Unsung
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commentCommented on: Thu Nov 30, 2006 @ 06:45am
the only thing i got ta say is that i live cause i have a dream, and ill live on with my dream (of being a cartoonist and a musician). I know that God wants me to live so that my brothers, sister, family, and friends wont have to worry me if i walk dead with angels spending they're last dayz by me. life's hard, but i dont trip off of it.


commentCommented on: Fri Dec 01, 2006 @ 12:13am
I go through the same thing. I joined football to unleash my anger on the other players and hammer them. Contact sports are a good way to do that. But I go through the same s**t in life. Moments in my life sky rocket but they get shot down brutily minutes or days later. I learned to live with this type of things. Its hard but you can do it. Play football or some other sport and unleash your anger there. Don't bottle it up or you will end up hurting some one serisly. In 4th grade a kid was makingof me and I was bottling it up for 2 years and I just snaped and bashed his head on a brick wall with all my might. Do n't bottle it up.
Good Luck
Cody



ZethX
Community Member
soccorchick
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Fri Dec 01, 2006 @ 02:37am
your loved!!! Very much!


User Comments: [11] [add]
 
 
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