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well....today was borning. i am almost done with the next chapter in my story for those of you who even read my story not just glance at it. oh well i have it on www.fanfiction.net so itf you want you can read it there. my username on there is BlueFireIce. if you are wondering what that means it has to do with YuYu Hakusho and the characters Botan Hiei and Yukina.

also for some odd reason i've been feeling depressed. i can't really figure out why. i mean i've been talking with my friends and such but something in the pit of my heart is chipping away at the healing of my heart. i'm starting to feel like i used to when school was around.

i talked about it in LI but it didn't help to much. all i guess i can do is talk to the consouler at my school. but i don't think that matters to you people. oh well. i'll just suck it up next year in 8th grade. i'll probably become a goth if you think about it. i have nothing against the. i mean i have cut before.

also LOVE SUCKS a**!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ******** everything now. life doesn't hold good things for me. i mean even my parents don't like me as much as they do my older and littler sister more than me. get treated differently since i'm a middle child. also when my sister found out i was cutting she was a b***h to me but i bet she has forgotten about it. i don't think it really mattered to her in the first place.

the only one who really cared was Diane. I love diane as a sister b/c she listens to me and cares. she's the best. she's one of my best friends. and i might be moving away from her so i'm becoming really depressed b/c of that too as well as school coming up and all the teasing that goes on.

all i have to do is distance myself away from people at school and i'll live. maybe thenn they'll leave me alone. maybe then...i won't be like this...

maybe...i'll become distant and won't ruin lives. i mean i don't really help them do i? i can't please other or at least that i don't know of. and i can't even please myself. i can give good advice but i can't live up to that. and damnit! why should i? i think maybe...maybe i should just runaway from it all. not kill myself just run away and see who truely cares for me.