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It begins with a dark glowing ember
something black burning its way out of me
searing the flesh
pain is the only thing i feel
scars all i see
oh no the fires burning my insides again
what can i do to silence my desire tonight
flames consuming reason
Leaving only ashes left
you will catch me regretting my decision

I can't keep telling myself what i want to hear
I can't just close my eyes

i know that
its killing me
and its poisoning the best in me
what i see i don't want to believe
so let me tell you more
about the lies i lead

that is how i chose to douse the flames in gasoline
broken teeth replace the blackout memories in my head
wreckage from the past haunts me, shakes me to the bone
i know it's over but i can't go home tonight
but after this i feel as empty as the night before
feel the pain and yet i'm still begging for more
masochistic nihilistic urging backward thought
my life's a mess and i can't find a way to fix it

I can't keep telling myself what i want to hear
I can't just close my eyes

its killing me
and its poisoning the best in me
what i see i don't want to believe
so let me tell you more
about the lie i lead

Calling calling out
the darkest reaches of my soul are riddled with self doubt
crawling crawling out
my will to fight will more than suffice
when others would lay down
it's only as dark as you make it

its killing me
and its poisoning the best in me
what i see i don't want to believe
so let me tell you more
about the lie i lead


This song is by atryu and I give them credit. I did not write this.