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Over the past few weeks, I've been experiencing some major emotional trauma. Something I haven't told anyone; I was seriously considerring suicide. However, something that happened this morning just ..clicked. In the past I would always tell myself that calm will always be at the end of the storm, but my recent troubles seemed so overwhelming they clouded my vision.
I was on my way to class this morning (I'm taking summer courses at Eastfield College) while listening to a CD I had put in the car radio. It was the soundtrack to Pokemon: The First Movie. Often, my mind wanders and distracts me from current tasks but it always has some relation with the present situation and sometimes mixed with events from the past. In this case, I was listening to the second track (Don't Say You Love Me by M2M) while reminiscing on attemptting to edit my own song on Guitar Hero: World Tour. I was thinking about finding a way to replicate that song on Guitar Hero and I couldn't help but think of my friends and how we always play (except for one occasion) everytime they're over at my house. I was imagining myself as the vocalist, singing exactly the way it was sung in the song. Naturally, being a guy (and just being me), imagining myself singing that particular song with the regular guy on bass, the usual on lead, and the silent one on drums made me burst out laughing spontaneously (not good while driving).
The moment was so emotional that I literally laughed, cried, and sang along while driving down Rowlett Road at 6:50 in the morning. When I got out of the car, I felt so good; like all my emotional baggage just melted off my shoulders and melded into the puddle at my feet. Of course it was raining, but I didn't mind.