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I began to have fleeting thoughts again, and now they have flooded my dreams.

The Future
The Past
The Present
The 'After Life'

Why now?
I thought I couldn't be any happier.
But then this sorrow consumes and gnaws at my mind.
Besides the sorrow, something else.

It's a new feeling, well relatively.
The churning of my innards, the gummy-like knees.
Sometimes I feel like I can't really get out of my mess of a bed.

People tell me it's love, and I believe them, because it's not a bad feeling.
I finally have a reason to wake up, to dream, to believe that things aren't bad at all.

I mean, come on, whoever knows me, knows that I was beginning to fade away.
Drift from friends, family, and humanity.
But now.. -shrugs- I don't know

I feel like I could 'splode from the inside out.
I can feel my brain pulse, my heart beat, my blood churn.

XD.

Yes, yes.
Like I said before, I'm new to this, whole 'showing of the emotions' crap.
So forgive and forget how I used to be.


This whole 'I want to die, I want to drink, I want to drug' phase has officially passed, and I don't regret a thing ^^

I'm healthier, stronger, wiser, smarter, and hopefully a faster person because of all that I have done.

And for the future.
I find myself wanting to be the best.
Wanting to Strive
Wanting to Work for a better.. EVERYTHING.

Even if it means stepping upon those who has stepped upon me.

It's finally time to burn those pages of my sorrow, and write upon crisp pages of the joys of tomorrow.


razz