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Any normal person wouldn’t suspect a thing, well actually no one would suspect anything except one race, that race simply is called the Tygraphoneoonmoeliotioneixszhffet¥dkiddkildtonicolxousa.ci. We’ll call the race .CI for now, they are the only race that can properly pronounce such a name, and the only race that can properly be the most intelligent life form in the entire universe. They are also shape shifters, and to keep this story from producing strange whitish, grayish blobs, they take the form of a human whenever mentioned. Talking to them is near impossible, except when you are equally smart. Which is darn near impossible, if not impossible to do. This was the problem when Jack was abducted three hours before his moldy refrigerator was about to become uncared for, for eternity. He faced the mind bogglingly hard quest to figure out the warning they were about to give him.
“Ciao, Jack.” Said tyrdckcidn.ce. .CE for short, but we’ll call him C for short.
“What?” replied Jack in a rather confused voice.
“Ciao.”
“Okay I am just assuming that means hello.”
“Tolerable. We would akin to request you to a banquet.”
“Akin?”
“Yes. Akin. Wait, we used the expression Akin incorrect, its more reminiscent of comparing two effects, we most incontestably mean, would you like to come to a banquet with us?”
“Incontestably? I will just assume that you mean…well, I don’t know, but I know what you mean.”
“Excellent. At this moment pursue behind me.”
Jack did just that, he followed behind the super intelligent being, all though right now understanding them wasn’t hard, the use of a rather large word such as incontestably is enough to throw off such a simple minded man such as Jack. What was to come was extremely hard for the poor, and simple-minded man, to comprehend.
They headed into a room much like the first only this one was larger. It actually had windows, and unlike the bare metal floor of the first room, this one had a table on top of the bare metal floor. This room was also spherical, just much, much bigger, about five times bigger. It stretched about five hundred feet in each direction. As they entered, C spoke first.
“Please, acquire a seat.”
“I’ll take this one.” Jack then proceeded in sitting down. He sat rather far from the strange creature, and played around with his dark brown hair. His hair wasn’t that long, but it was long enough to play with, and his ADD didn’t help much at all.
“Great! Currently all we have to do is get you absolutely prepared in support of what we are going to enlighten you with.”
“Great.” Of course this was said in a sarcastic way that only Jack can so sarcastically say. Jack is often called the most sarcastic person on the planet, even his sarcasm is sarcastic, just like at this exact moment.
“This news we bear is most terrible, we plan on extracting you onto a relatively hefty space transport in approximately 31/2 hours. We adore witnessing how creatures respond to the most traumatizing situations ever. See we love to torment populaces, and we love to do it outlandish ways. See, you are one of the auspicious ones, you could essentially continue to exist, contrasting some of our other…lets say more atrocious tests, like the Transdimensional Globular Goobifying test. Now are you prepared for some provisions?”
“Okay, I think I’ll just bash my head over this strangely blunt object sitting, quite strangely, and quite randomly here on this rather circular table, which can also be used as a blunt weapon, but I would prefer to actually just use this strangely blunt object that is sitting here.
And Jack did just that.
 Cracovin · Thu Mar 31, 2005 @ 02:40am · 0 Comments |
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