Bright lights blinking
Laminating the signs of once busy buildings
--Now deserted
The roads empty
I’m the only one here
Lost in my own world-
Sanctuary.
Caring-the cause of my demise
I wrapped myself in it all
Now every scar returns
Bringing pain to me with the false words you swore to
And I believed every syllable,
--Handed to you, my world-
And watched ever so acceptingly as you lit it ablaze
(Where did that get me?)
Up on a pedestal alone
Perfection an obsession
--To you.
I lye in myself for hours
Watching the starry clouds drift
And time stands still
As the minute hand ticks
Each second passing the moment I turn
What happened to the eternity of bliss you had promised me..?
And I’m just another button on your vest-
So dull-colorless
The new shine rusted away-
I remain lifeless in the doldrums
As if I child’s Barbie,
Locked away in the closet
Due to lack of interest
Who ever said I was interested in being yours though?
Just something proclaimed-expected
As the rumors spread
--Branching off from society into my veins
Running my blood cold
--Running away from you
I’m running on empty.
(Don’t know what to believe anymore.)
Duck tape-the solution to your problems
After all, it fixes everything, right?
At least that’s what they told you while you so eagerly broke me
Tape me up and call it perfection
Society’s creation.
Glitter me up-paint my skin porcelain
And polish my crimson lips.
They bring us all together
(Disaster in the making)
--Gossip spreads like wildfire
And stereotypes clash
Chaos lines the bleachers
Swimming in all of it, I can’t help going under
My face blending into the crowd
Just like every scream the escapes me.
Turn my heart off
And flick the switch in my brain
So much still overflowing from my heart
I soak in toxin
Neither numbing nor calming
It only brings me to tears
I want out.
I want life.
I want an escape--
From the chain you placed around my ankle
Instead trading me to the shadows
For the immortality I had offered
Instead you waited for a silver platter
Denying myself of the freedom I longed for
And I can’t forget your words
Sweetness trickling from each letter
Poison to my mind.
I drank it all down still
So used to the taste by now
(Betrayal)
--The bitter stinging at my tongue-dizzy buzzing at my ear.
And I look to the stars-
It won’t be all right despite what they say
‘Cause hate is ******** real
As was my love..
And I just want to shield the world tonight
--If only then
While the stars fade away
And I, disintegrate.
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