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Well its another day....well actually it's the start of a new day. It's really early Saturday morning. So, Friday has come and gone. I'm here at Preston's apartment. Still on Courtney's laptop. I conficated it here for awhile.
I'm still thinking about my love life. I love Dave with all my heart like I said, but sometimes I always wonder. Not just about me, but about Dave too. I think he flirts too much too, but that might be all that it. After all that has happened to me in the past that now I tend to tread carefully. He just seems awfully close to Dana. I've been told it's nothing,but sometimes I don't believe this is true. He is going riding with her parents when they come up in a couple weekends. I am NOT happy about that. Not in the least! I know it's cool that he is getting to ride his new bike with other Harley people, but it's just a weird feeling I have I guess. I really don't know what to think. I guess I'll just go with it for now and what will be will be. But some times I just can't help but think of Pat.
I met Pat awhile back, clear back when it was his first degree into Tau Beta Sigma. That was awhile ago. I remember us flirting at Eatin' Park after that. Then we went to the Phi Mu Alpha party. I can't remember much about that though. Then on the 9th was our formal, there I got to see him again. I was going to dance with him, but I couldn't ask. Plus it seemed to me that he had enough girls to dance with anyways. Then afterwards we went up to Nicole Dezzutti's apartment. Dave left with Dana to take her to Mike Dascoli's party and I stayed at the apartment. Yeah, I didn't like the fact that I was more or less told to wait there. "You can stay here, I'll be right back" yeah...right.... Anyways, I curled up on Pat's lap in the chair. I have a picture of it too, I am going to post on photobucket here soon....ne ways.... finally Dave came back and Pat kept telling him (Dave) that he was going to take me home. Dave said he didn't care. Was he joking or maybe a part of him was serious. I wonder.....
They were talking about him tonight, and I was all excited because I thought I was going to see him, but I wonder what he is like. He sounds like a real flirt. Then again it really doesn't matter, does it? It's not like I'm going to do any thing. I guess I am happy where I am, but like I said, my life if full of what if's.
Then there's Julie.Sorry hon, tonight is my night to rant. I don't mean to hurt your feelings with anything I say, but somethings just need to be said at this moment. You want to know one OMWF song I relate to alot. "Standing" and not just b/c my Giles sings it, but it's that I know what he feels. I feel like I'm standing in your way. I know you all to well and there may be other reason's but I know one of the reasons you broke up with Charlie is because of me. You can deny it all you want,but like I said I know you too well. And you said you didn't want to date anyone else. That is because of me too. Julie,you have to let me go. I don't belong with you I'm sorry, but you are not my 'someone just for me', not matter how much you want me to be. I can't ever date you, you are my best friend and that is the way I want to keep it. I mean look at the past realationships with my other two best friends. They were nice but then things happen, and I don't want to lose my best friend. Plus sweetie, sometimes you annoy the hell out of me. I'm sorry, but like the other night when you tried to take my picture off of me, that really pissed me off. I want you to move on, I need you to move on! I don't want to be standing in your way anymore. Please move on... "I wish I could say the right words to lead you through this land. Wish I could play the father and take you by the hand.Wish I could stay, but now I understand. I'm standing in the way."
Well I'm done pissing off people and rambling on and on... hope ppl will still talk to me after reading this.
heart Blessed Be heart
 Zoey Mikaela · Sat Apr 16, 2005 @ 07:43am · 0 Comments |
