• There once lived a man named Clyde.
    He woke up wanting to glide.
    He made his arms stiff, jumped off a cliff,
    Screamed, fainted and died.

    Next door lived a girl named Sue.
    I was told she contracted the flu.
    From what I've heard, she was attacked by a bird
    And didn't know what to do.

    Sue's boyfriend's name was Doug.
    He had a lovely pet bug.
    The bird that attacked Sue knew what to do.
    I just stood there and shrugged.

    It turns out Doug's father was Clyde.
    He was shocked to find out he had died.
    I haven't remembered that since I killed my cat.
    I guess I assumed that he cried.

    Today I saw a puddle of red.
    It belonged to my friend's friend Fred.
    He was lying on the ground, asleep and sound...
    But it turns out he was dead.