Wild horses

• Artist: II CHEE CHEE LEE II
• Description: A poem i randomly made up of wonderful creaturse rooming the face of the earth. There simply wild horses.
• Date: 09/19/2008
• Tags: wild horses

Their Hoofbeats hit the dirt,
With Soft clouds of air puffing from their nostrils,
Grace exceeding their Beauty,
their strides long yet powerful,
With long tangled manes and wiry dense tails flowing,
they have their minds set on the day to come,
to survive the harsh plains,
so beautiful,
yet so cruel.
The young stay close,
minds buzzing
with fluffy tails and high pitched whinnies,
their short strides quicken to keep up with the rush
of yet another move,
never knowing what the day may bring.
but in the soft beating of their hooves,
their Wild spirit will always be pure.
because They are Wild horses.

Comments

[Elizowo]

I think you did quite good. The stanza's aren't separated, but it is very good.

and to DeathsNightChild-
yes the stanza's do need to be separated, the poem flows fine, multi syllable words don't matter in poems, it does not seem to elementary you try writing it better! and not all poems have to rhyme dingle dork! Pfff get a life would ya? This poem is fine the way it is. gawd

[villaabe]

what the heck was that... that is really the worst writting i have ever read, I would know, i am an enlish major.



1. separate your poem into stanzas
2. make the poem flow more
3. use words with less syllables
4. seems too elementary
5. make it rhyme!!!